A-N U-N-I-T-E-D F-A-M-I-L-Y

Person 1: Why is your dad not in good terms with his brother?
Person 2: Because, my dad’s brother didn’t mention my dad’s education details in his son’s wedding invitation.

-- Scene Ends --

Person 1: Why is your mom not in good terms with her sister?
Person 2: Because, my mom’s sister gifted only a coffee set for my marriage. My mom expected much better gift.

-- Scene Ends --

Dad in Chennai: Son, can you come to Chennai for Diwali?
Son in Bangalore: No dad, I really cannot come. I am busy with lot of other works here in Bangalore.

-- Scene Ends --

Husband to Wife: Hey Lalitha, your brother Sudhakar just called me. He is planning for a family get-together next month. He is asking for 1,500/- per head. Being a 4 member family, we should give 6,000 to him.
Wife: What? 6,000? No way. Tell him that our kids have got school exams. We cannot afford 6,000 for a family get-together. Such a waste.

-- Scene Ends --

This being the case in some families, there is a 130 member family that successfully arranges for a family get-together once in a year. They meet every December in a common place (resort, park etc.,). One family among the group of families take charge of arranging the whole show – Inviting everyone for the event, following up with them, booking the meeting place, budget planning, finance arrangement, logistics arrangement, hospitality, events to be arranged on the day of meet, food etc and etc., They book the entire resort and spend the entire day there. Lot of events / games are arranged for people of various age groups (kids to oldies). No one outside the family is allowed inside the resort – strictly only the family. At an average, the cost for this get-together is Rs 1,200 per head. Pretty good, isn't it? The beauty is, irrespective of everyone's busy schedule, EVERYONE in the entire family attends this December fest. Just imagine how difficult it is to make sure that all 130 in the entire family attends this event. More than the ‘Planning’, the very immediate attitude of “I will be there for get-together” needs a special mention. Last time when the family met, the ladies were asked to dress in black and gents in white attire. A picture of the entire family:

My friend Soujanya is part of this tightly-coupled family. She’s the one who told me all these details. This 130 member family is from Soujanya’s mom side. A big network I would say. Her grandfather (mom's dad) 'Suryanarayana Shetty' is the root cause of this 130 member family :) Her grandfather had 7 sons and 5 daughters from two different marriages. Good to see that they live in harmony till date. Envy this lucky family.

Sweetheart

In all my long distance road travel (bus), I have never been lucky to get a chic (age 18-24) near my seat. Hopeless.

In all my train travel, at the max the compartment itself had only 1-2 chics. Worst part was, those chics cannot be seen from my seat; their seat were placed in such a way! Design!

In all my air travel, most of the time the seat next to me was empty. When it was occupied, it would either be a male or a grandma. Combination cannot be better than this.

Mr. Fate has tried all possible dance styles on all my travels. Mr Fate makes sure that I don't even a chance.

But, the travel from Bangalore to Chennai (April 26) was good. I boarded the train at 6.30 AM. Needless to mention, even in this journey, a 35+ aunty was sitting near me in the train. But, she had a kid. The kid was sleeping when I saw her. Deep sleep. To spend time - I was solving puzzles, then listened to music. Bored to death. So, started looking out at the fast moving lands. 3 hours went by. The kid was still sleeping in her mom's lap.

The kid got up. 'She' kid :) She looked like an angel. Black+Yellow color tops and red+white mix skirt. I actually don't know whether to call it as skirt. Not sure on girls dress. Naive. (Mr KP, do you expect somebody to teach you all the girls dresses? Huh? You could have directly written that here. Any takers?). Till the time the kid was sleeping, I could feel silence. The kid got up and the silence was gone. Whatever was sold in the train, she wanted it. "Maa, get me this ice cream. Maa, get me samosa. Maa, get me cutlet. Maa, get me lays. Maa, get me juice." Her voice was very * very soft. Her mom got most of the stuff she asked for. But, she did refuse to buy some stuffs (samosa, ice cream). 'She' kid started crying loud. Loud enough to make the entire compartment people stare at her mom and make her feel embarrassed. When the 'She' kid cried, I was very sad and feeling bad. She's such a lovely looking angel. I would have got her whatever she asked for. I actually cursed her mom for letting the kid cry. Finally, 'She' kid's trick worked and she had an ice cream at hand. I was looking at her continuously for 15 minutes - watched all the actions she did. 'She' kid couldn't open the ice cream scoop's top cover. She don't know how to open. She tried to find out the cover by looking at all possible angles. When she lifted the ice cream scoop and looked at the bottom of the cup, a water droplet fell on her nose. She immediately shaked her face like a pomaranian dog. She was so * so cute to look at. 'She' kid finally asked for help to her mom. Her mom opened the ice cream cup's top cover and gave the ice cream cup to the kid. She dipped the ice cream eating stick into the scoop of ice cream and took the stick out and licked it :) Thats how she eats ice cream. Kid kept licking at the ice cream stick. Soon the ice cream melted and most of the cream spilled in the 'She' kid's skirt (again, I don't know what to call the dress as). Her mom cleaned it and she started having the rest of the ice cream. Poor 'She' kid. Kid started crying thinking that her ice cream was over. I was a silent spectator till now. It was 4 hours since our departure. I didn't even utter a word. I kept looking at the kid. Her mom said "Boomika, don't cry. Have the rest of the ice cream." Ok, she's Boomika, the 'She' kid.

Boomika had a heavy lunch, her stomach was full. There was very small gap between me and her mom in the seat. She tried to squeeze between us and sit in that small gap. The gap might be of the size of a palm. I smiled at her and moved aside to make the kid sit comfortable. She smiled at me. Wonderful it was. From that moment, till the end of the journey she was with me. I had my earphones ON. She wanted it. I gave her my mobile first. It was heavy for her to lift. She holded it in two hands. She pressed all possible buttons to unlock the phone and see the bright screen. I unlocked the phone for her. She smiled. She asked "Aaataaa" (meaning 'Song' in Kannada). I gave her my ear phone. She had it in her hand. She tried to figure out where in the phone to insert the ear phone plug. She took the plug and inserted in all possible holes in the mobile (charger point, key chain holder, etc). I inserted the ear phone plug in its port and played a song for her. I took one side of the ear phone and kept it in her right ear. She jumped. She was so happy. She took the other side of the ear phone and placed it in my left ear. I wanted to take her in my lap and kiss her. We listened to one entire song, with one side of the ear phone in her ear and other other side in my ear. Then she removed the ear phone plug from the phone, the song output could be heard from the speaker of the phone. Her face was bright lit on listening to the sound from the phone speaker. She kept the mobile very near to her ear and banged her head like a rock music star. She would have banged for 2-3 minutes continuously. Then I played her different songs and put both the ear phone ends on her ears. I played "Nenjukkul peithidum maamalai" song from Vaaranam Aayiram twice to this little angel. I also took couple of pictures of the kid in my mobile -- normal pictures, pictures when she was listening to music. When I showed her the picture, she showed it to her mom immediately and felt proud. She said "innondhu photo" (meaning "One more photo" in Kannada). She posed for it too. Some pictures of Boomika:

Click on the pictures to enlarge.

With ear phones ON.

I enjoyed her company for almost 2 hours. When our train reached Chennai, I felt "I wish I have a kid like her after my marriage". Such a cute, heart-stealing, lovely angel she is.

Side effects of IT-ophobia

Achluophobia, Barophobi, Cacophobi, Dendrophobia, Ecophobia, Gamophobia, Heliophob, IT-ophobia, yes, its a new term coined by yours truly. Remember it: IT-ophobia.

If you are an IT person, am sure you will agree with this statement - "IT is getting on me so much, IT has changed me so much". Even if you are not an IT person, no problem, please agree with me in this statement :) Few top of the mind Incidents / Events / Pointers that I have noticed in my 4 years of IT career are below:

1. One of my friend got a new notebook (if you thought of a laptop / computer, then you are affected by IT-ophobia). Its a paper notebook that we used during school / college days. I took the book and wrote his name in the first page. I wrote it with a wrong spelling. He said "KP, delete that line". I asked "Did you say *delete*?". My friend ":) Oh yes, rub or scratch it off yaar, this IT.....".

2. I swear I did this. One fine evening, I came home after my office hours. My house main door was locked. Absent mindedly, I took my office ID card and swiped it in the house door instead of using the calling bell. In the next second I thought "Oh shit, what am I doing". Ding dong, ammaaa....

3. Three of my friends were figuring out a solution for a problem in their project. They were using one computer. The cubicle in which they were seated was small. There were two more people in that cubicle. So, totally it made 5 IT heads. The cubible was jam-packed without space. During the discussion, one of my friend wanted to get up and go to the rest room. He said "Hey Harish, rollback your chair a little" (he actually meant, pull back your chair). For the next 20 minutes we made sure that harish's leg was pulled (we sticked to leg only)

4. I was installing a new software in my mobile. (Un)fortunately, the mobile hanged (it runs Windows OS, so imagine). My friend said "Oh shit, restart the mobile".

5. Earlier it was Sardar jokes. Now, its software engineer jokes. Times changed.

6. Conversation between house owner and tenant (prospective):
Prospective Tenant (PT): Sir, is the house for rent?
House Owner (HO): Yes, it is.
PT: How much is the rent?
HO: Where are you working?
PT: Huh, you will decide the rent based on my occupation?
HO: Not like that, but, tell me. Where do you work?
PT: (with much hesitation) Sir.. I am a software engineer..... IT.....
HO: Oh IT, then its Rs. 20,000 rent for a 800 sq feet house. Maintenance, EB, water cost everything extra
PT: Sir, I am not running the company, I am working for the company
HO: 20,000 is the rent. Many people are asking for it.
PT: ("Hello ICICI bank... do you give loans for paying house rent...? I am a software engineer....")

7. Managing multiple credit cards. Honestly, I don't know how to use a credit card when I was at college. But now, I am an expert on it. I pay 10-12K at an average per month. A company offered this "Buy our card, and get a clock free". Just for the sake of the clock, I got the card.

8. You would have to attend at least 5 calls per day and repeat the same dialogue to the credit card offering banks "Sir, I am not interested in your credit card offer, I already have one. Please do not disturb me". I use a technique. Whenever I get a call from banks on card offerings, I say "I am in meeting, its indefinite in time, thanks. Bye". I used to say this line for ALL the card offering calls. It so happened that I was entering the rest room and uttering this dialogue (I am in a meeting.....) on the phone and a colleague gave me a smile wondering what I am upto (do you have meetings in restroom?)

9. Have you heard of this word called "EMI"? :) If you are into IT, first and foremost rule: Pay EMI :D (house, car, phone, blah and blah). I pay three EMI's. Easily Mindchanging Index.

10. Go onsite. Immediately take pictures and upload in Orkut, Picasa, FaceBook. Change the 'Living, Country" details in Orkut, FaceBook. Start complaining India. Have time? Read THIS.

11. Tummy. This one word says it all. No explanations.

Boys Vs Girls

Disclaimer: This is my own view :)

Boys Vs Girls is a dance show in Vijay TV; telecast at 8PM on Friday and Saturday. There are two set of teams - Boys and Girls team. They compete with each other in different dance rounds. So far, 11 episodes have been completed. It is supposed to be a dance show, but one can see lot of activities happening other than dance. Main points to be noticed in this show:

1. Most of the episodes had the kids (Abinaya, Rinson) in the spotlight. It doesn't look like we are watching an adult dance competition.
2. George, the Boys team captain doesn't dance at all :( He is too good in expressions, but no dance.
3. If its duet, then its George (boys team captain) and Brindha Das (girls team captain). No heavy movements. Their dance steps were very easy and I got bored watching them dance. It looks like a party hall dance all times. The dance competition spirit goes off. If George doesn't know dance, at least he should learn it as it is a high TRP rating dance show in Tamil.
4. Lot of activites other than dance happens here. Be it cake cutting for dancer's birthdays, idle talks, unnecessary gimmick video clips / scenes.
5. No clear cut rules. Suddenly an extra round comes in between series of episodes, new rules in Challenge rounds, suddenly the episodes are numbered (this is the 10th episode, 11th episode, 12th episode etc), don't know when and how the winners will be elected at last. At least, I was confused for the first few episodes on the rules and points calculation.
6. Judges. There were no explanation on who all will be the permanant judges. The show have had Namitha, Srikanth, Sangeetha, Krish, Jeeva, Anuya, Mumtaj as judges till now. Srikanth and Mumtaj are the current judges, dont know when it will change.
7. Don't know why the Airtel Super Singer finalists were invited for one of the dance episodes. I think 5 singers were present in the show; nobody uttered even a single word.
   

I somehow feel that Boys Vs Girls isn't clicking as much as Jodi Number 1 did. I am a big time fan of Jodi Number 1 (all 3 seasons). Having said all this, I still like Boys Vs Girls show :) The reason being - The comperers DD and Deepak, dance of Michael, Guna, comedy of Shiva Karthikeyan.

Worst Times

are when someone you love / like dies.
are when you hear torrent of bad news when you are already depressed.

VJ

If you are in Tamil Nadu, you must be laughing out on seeing some of the VJs in few Tamil channels. I have noticed a pattern in them. Many of them wear tight T-shirts, sometimes you might be wondering "why are they wearing the T-Shirts that were taken during their school days?". Their hair 'style' (??) needs a special mention. Mostly, it will be spikes with more than 3 colors; left side of the head will be blackish brown; center portion of the head will be brownish maroon; right side of the head will be maroonish black. God'ish help'ish them'ish. It will be nice if they could wear a neat wig. Now, coming to the "extra fittings". You could notice some round "ornaments" (??) in their hands. They come in fancy attractive colors, you would appreciate Ramarajan had you taken a look at those fancy colored materials. Sometimes, the size of the material looks much more attractive - they extend from the palm to the elbow! Now, thats Yo-Yo.

Lets get on to the mannerism of some of the VJs. "Sir, TV volume eh konjam kammi pannunga sir" - How many of you have heard this? :) This dialogue is pretty normal, nothing wrong in it; some VJs manage it properly. But I see few VJs who get annoyed when the TV volume is high at the caller's end. They just speak at an irritated voice and say "TV volume eh kammi pannunga" and immediately they realize that they are infront of camera and finally manage a tough smile "eeeeeeee, sollunga sir, TV volume eh kammi panniteengala". Oh god, that immediate change on their face is priceless :)

Lets get on VJs, yes plural. When more than one VJ is in the show, its more fun. Both of them will simultaneously ask the same question to the caller; one will try to start a topic and the other will immediately try to talk something else by confusing the former VJ there by making the show much funnier; both will try to dominate each other by talking lot.

But, I will have to agree that there are some good VJs too - simple dressing, very good mangement on the caller, pleasing voice and good eye contact. This will do.